Mike Outler's Blog

It seems we’re about to hit an all time low when it comes to personal responsibility and the idea that everyone’s a victim.  Later this week a New Jersey judge will decide if the sender of a text message might be partially liable for a terrible automobile accident  because………(hold on, take a deep breath) the driver was reading that message on his cell phone and drifted into oncoming traffic.  Claiming the girl who sent the text was “electronically present”.

Read that one again!

Well if that’s the case, I should sue Krispy Kreme for making me fat because they left the HOT light on!!!

Here’s the article:

I was talking with my oldest daughter and she declared, “I’m a vegetarian!”  As you can imagine my response, I replied, “Oh yeah?”  As if to say–Where the heck did this come from?!?

Anyway, she continued, “Yes I am!  Well, except for Chic-Fil-A.  …..and Zaxbys.”

Uhm, ok…..

It was a funny conversation and we both had a good time with it.   It made me think of how my mind works pertaining to making deals with myself when it comes to food and starting a new, healthy eating program (diet).

To say the least, I’m inconsistent.  I bargain with myself.  I make deals.  I falter!

However, I’ve managed to go THIRTY DAYS without any colas.  My drug of choice has been Diet Mt. Dew or Diet Coke/Pepsi.  Always diet.  Like I could convince myself of placing the following order:

Yes Ma’am, I’ll take your triple cardiac bacon cheeseburger with extra cholesterol with a side of greasy fries……and a Diet Coke!  As if the diet soda cancelled out the other stuff!

Anyway, I’m contemplating my next health move starting this Saturday.  I would like to cut out all fast food.  Or at least, remove it from my regular diet.  My eventual goal is to eat “Clean Foods“.  That’s another blog for another day.

I like to set a start date for myself and get it all out of my system before I begin a new eating plan.  What about you?

Do you like to psych yourself up for such occasions?

Are you on a particular eating plan right now and if so, how’s it working for you?

Please respond and let me know what you’re doing.  I’ll go first in the comments section!

Tomorrow marks my Mom’s (insert random number here) birthday!!! 

Please join my brothers and me in saying….

HAPPY BIRTHDAY!

She has endured so much and deserves to be celebrated in so many ways.  She’s not one for attention, but let’s overwhelm her with birthday wishes. 

Last Sunday a great friend of mine, we’ll call him Fred, took my two daughters and I (We’ll call them Princess & Sunshine) fishing in his boat.  We had an awesome time as it was their first time salt water fishing.  I grew up fishing in this area with my dad and uncle.  I’ve taken my two girls fishing before, but only in fresh water.  Salt water fishing is better in my opinion and by the looks of these photos, you’ll agree, they had a great time!

Oh, and you’ll need to go through the entire thing to understand the title of this blog.

ENJOY

Leaving the marina

Princess catching her first salt water fish--whiting!

Sunshine catching one too.

Woohoo! They caught their first shark. AT THE SAME TIME!!!

The St. Simons Island Lighthouse in the background. Just off shore.

We enjoyed going under the Sydney-Lanier Bridge.

Now we're getting down to business! Fred taught the girls how to drive the boat. Yes, they were going full throttle

Yep, Miss Sunshine was going fast too!

After we got back to the marina, we made them clean the fish and bait (shrimp) so we could eat it when we got back. Nothing like fresh seafood.

Ok, here's the story on the raccoon. When we got back and cleaned the boat, we were confronted by a not-so-happy raccoon who clearly had rabies. (Disoriented, wandering out in the day, limping around, etc) To spare you from all the details of what happened next, I'll leave you with a quote from a popular Reality TV Show, Swamp People......"Choot Em Elizabeth!!!"

It started out as any normal day.  Wait!  Scratch that!  Every day of my life usually starts out like a normal day.  Nothing different about this one.

I was at work when I received a call to see my HR rep.  I immediately went to the front office thinking, “What did I do?”  Normally a visit with HR does NOT result in a job promotion or a notification that you’ve “Won a cruise to the Caribbean!!!” So I was anxious about this visit.  My HR rep says, “I’ve been ordered by the I.R.S. to give you this letter.”

GULP!

Naturally I’m thinking that I’m being audited or my wages are being garnished.  Not the case.

After reading the letter and rereading it, I discovered the following:

1.  The I.R.S. has a lot of time on their hands.

2.  I think that they have it out for me.

3.  Perhaps someone reported me for whatever reason and now they’re trying to get me for something.

Note: I have ALWAYS paid my share of taxes and I will NEVER try to get one over on the I.R.S.  Ever!  I do my best to play by the rules and while I will use all the legal deductions I possibly can, I can lay my head on the pillow at night knowing I have nothing to hide.

With that said, as you can imagine, I was a bit worried.  Here’s what the letter read (in a nutshell):

WE HAVE DETERMINED THAT YOU ARE NOT ENTITLED TO CLAIM EXEMPT STATUS OR MORE THAN A SPECIFIED NUMBER OF ALLOWANCES.

Really?  First of all, I have never claimed exempt status (Read: exempt from having to pay federal taxes).  Secondly, what follows in the letter is even more frightening.

WE INSTRUCTED YOUR EMPLOYER TO BEGIN WITHHOLDING INCOME TAX FROM YOUR WAGES BASED ON THE FOLLOWING WITHHOLDING RATE (MARITAL STATUS) AND WITHHOLDING ALLOWANCES:

WITHHOLDING RATE: SINGLE (keep in mind I’m legally married and have been since last year)  WITHHOLDING ALLOWANCES: 0000

As you can imagine, I’m about as mad as a beaver with a tooth ache at this point.  If you know anything about me, you’ll know that I cannot stand the Federal Government getting any more involved with my personal business that what’s necessary.  Basically, they tried to tell me that I cannot claim the status of being married on my W4.  Not only that, I have to claim zero on my allowances.  Oh no you didn’t!!!

Of course, there’s a number I can call to challenge this process.  And I called….

IMMEDIATELY.

I.R.S. AGENT: Hello, this is Mary (name withheld), badge #1234567 with the (GET THIS) WITHHOLDING COMPLIANCE DEPARTMENT, how may I help you?

MJO: (As I’m thinking, Withholding Compliance Dept? What?)  Yes ma’am.  I received a letter from my employer…………….(I go through the entire letter)

She proceeds to confirm who I am by asking for my personal info.  Standard.

I.R.S. AGENT: Yes, we have been randomly reviewing citizen’s records and have discovered that you are not allowed to claim yourself as a married person and you should be claiming zero on your allowances.

Ok, at this point, I have a sudden flashback to a book a read in jr. high school.  Anyone want to take guess about what it was?  George Orwell?  It was the book, 1984.  If you remember, it was a book written in 1948 that ended up being a timely prophesy about the future.  Big Brother (The US Federal Govt)  is watching you!  If you haven’t read it, get it!

I was stunned by what she said and proceeded to tell her that I was married last year, and that I do, in fact, have proof.  What happened next was a complete shock and quite frankly an intrusion of my privacy.

I.R.S. AGENT 007:  Mr. Outler, I’ll need the following information about your spouse……Full name, date of birth, social security number, place of employment, employer’s address, employer’s tax I.D. number, and her projected yearly income.

MJO: I’m sorry ma’am, we must have a bad connection.  I didn’t seem to understand you correctly.  What did you just say?  Is this a prank call?

What followed was a back-and-forth conversation, while polite and respectful, that led to her letting me know, basically, when my wife does get a job, I AM TO CALL HER BACK AND LET HER KNOW WHERE SHE IS NOW EMPLOYED AND HER EMPLOYER’S PREVIOUSLY REQUESTED INFORMATION!!!  WHAT?!?

Not only that, she let me know that she’ll be contacting my employer within the next 7-10 business days to tell them that I can claim “married” status as well as “XXXX” allowances.

MJO:  Well thank you very much AGENT 007, you have a lovely day!!!

Ok, I wasn’t rude to her.  She was only trying to do her job.  But, this entire experience was a wake up call to me and it makes me wonder what our government is really trying to do.

Are they so desperate for money that they’ll nickel and dime us until they meet budget?  Are they getting involved in our personal lives to the extent that they want to know every time we go to the bathroom?  Hopefully not.

I share this with you as a warning.  As a personal experience that, God forbid, you have to go through.  Please let me know if you’ve been on the receiving end of something like this.  I look forward to any and all information you can share.  Feel free to let me know if it’s confidential, as I will NOT post your personal info.

Marathon runners will tell you that, at some point in the race, you’ll “hit the wall“.  It’s random, it’s unpredictable.  But it has been known to occur at the 20 mile point or 200 yards before the finish line.  It’s about completely running out of energy.  Dick Beardsley (American long distance runner) once said about the wall, “It felt like an elephant jumped out of a tree on to my shoulders and was making me carry it the rest of the way in.”

During the 2012 National Marathon To Finish Breast Cancer, I hit the wall– at mile 5 when we began to run on Jacksonville Beach!  It wasn’t the normal “wall” that runners speak of.  It was a wall of 30F temperatures and 20-25 mph winds in our faces.  My hands were numb, in fact, they went numb, then tingled, then they simply hurt–pure pain.  The course didn’t turn south for good until about mile 16.  All I could think of was, “If this is as bad as it gets, I can handle it–I CAN DO THIS“.  I’ve never gone this far before.  In fact, I had only trained for about a month prior to this race.  Most people who train for a marathon, train for one year.  Me, one month.  My longest training run was just under 4 miles.  Crazy? YES!  Reason?  I’ll explain.

A small part of me wanted to finish the marathon to mark another item off my bucket list.  While that’s true, there was a greater motivation.  A few years back, my mom survived breast cancer.  She endured six rounds of chemotherapy and countless radiation treatments.  She was cancer-free for a while and making sure she went to her check-up appointments and followed doctor’s orders.  Well, cancer has a way of rearing its ugly head more than one time.

That’s right, it’s back!  She has it again!

This time it’s in one of her lungs.  The doctors have said it’s totally unrelated to her earlier BC (Breast Cancer).  I hate cancer!  I hate what it does to a person–I hate what it does to families.  However, as a follower of Christ, I KNOW that NOTHING takes God by surprise and HE knows what she’s going through and what she will go through and HE will give her the grace and strength to handle it.  With that said, I felt like I needed to do this.  Call  it therapy, call it what you want.  This is the way I saw it:

IF SHE CAN TOUGH THIS OUT ONE MORE TIME (AND SHE WILL), THEN I CAN FINISH THIS MARATHON!!!

My mom, without a doubt, is one of the toughest ladies (YES, lady–she is also a woman of grace) I have ever known.  I’ve always said that I hope to be a tough as her one day.

I ask that you join me and my family in praying for her.  Earnestly and sincerely. She will undergo surgery this Thursday (2/16/2012) to remove the mass in her left lung and take out about 20% of  that lung.  She’s a fighter and knows that she can overcome this obstacle.  Her attitude is great and as we all know, ATTITUDE IS EVERYTHING!

So Mom, this medal is for you!

Thank you for praying for her.  I will certainly update her progress from time-to-time.

Today I survived the 9:00 O’clock Spin Class at my local gym.  And I mean SURVIVED it!  One hour of torture orchestrated by a nice lady who evidently needed to vent.  I needed the abuse and I’m glad it’s over. 

Ice therapy.

Since it was my first time in a long time to take part in a group workout, I was very aware of my surroundings.  So much so that I noticed every little behavior and movement outside of the normal pedaling.  So I’ve listed people “YOU DON’T WANT TO BE” while in a spin class.

THE GUY WHO DANCES TO THE MUSIC

If you ever feel the urge to stand up on the bike and make the “Can’t Touch This” moves like MC Hammer, for the sake of everything sacred, DON”T!  Yes you look stupid and I just might hop off my bike and push you over! 

THE PERSON WHO HAS TO DO MORE THAN YOU’RE ASKED

You know who you are–teacher’s pet!  You don’t have to cycle twice as fast as everyone else while the rest of us are drinking water, towelling off, trying to catch our breath, etc.  I thought this behavior stopped in jr. high?

THE ONE WHO USES 27 PAPER TOWELS AND TOSSES THEM ON THE FLOOR

We know you’re sweating dude!  News Flash: The rest of us are as well.  Next time, instead of killing 3 Southern Yellow Pine Trees (Yes I work for a paper mill), bring a towel! 

THE LADY WHO GRUNTS LIKE A PROFESSIONAL TENNIS PLAYER

If you need to let out a yelp, scream like you’re giving birth, or grunt like Jimmy Conners used to, maybe this class isn’t for you.  You scared me and I’m just glad you weren’t giving birth.  Delivering a baby wasn’t on my to-do list today.

As I type this, one news source has reported that former Penn State Coach, Joe Paterno, has passed away from complications of cancer.  Other sources have not!  Sometimes, navigating the murky waters of the internet can be tricky.  While one website can be reliable, other sites can not.

Either way, if he has passed on or not, there’s only one word to sum up the last six months,

SAD!

 One thing that kept coming to the frontal lobe region of my head is this: WHAT IS THE PROPER RESPONSE, AS A CHRISTIAN, TO THE EVENTUAL DEATH OF JOE PATERNO?

I ask this because I truly believe there’ll be some who will spew vile comments about the former Nittany Lions coach, simply because of what has transpired in 2011.  Let’s get one thing straight, Joe Pa made a terrible mistake and had a lapse in judgment when he failed to report Sandusky for allegedly abusing young boys on school campus.  He admits it himself.  Monumental mistake!  There’s no telling how many kids could have been saved from the evil hands of Sandusky had he gone further with personally investigating the matter.

I certainly do not want to grant him sainthood, but as believers, we have an obligation to be careful with our words.

I vividly recall how some Christians responded to the sudden and untimely death of Michael Jackson.  Pedophile or not, it really bothered me how some almost rejoiced in the fact that he died.  It was as if they were thumbing their nose at such tragedy.  All I could think of was, “Wow!  You’re really not making a good name for us as Christians!”

Whether Joe Paterno has asked God to forgive him for sins of omission, I don’t know.  BUT, it isn’t our place to stand in judgement and ridicule him or point the finger, lest we make a similar mistake.

I believe our position should be as such: Be kind and thoughtful with our words and not come to a conclusion about him that isn’t warranted.  

Whether or not Joe Pa has passed from this life into the next, isn’t the main thing for us.  How we respond as Christians is important.

I would like to say that I hope he’s resting peacefully and not in pain–if he’s still alive.  If not,

God speed and Rest In Peace!

Long time friend, Michael Jones, who’s a minister near Detroit, Michigan, shares my frustrations with the common misconceptions about taking Christ out of Christmas as well as the greater part of American society.

However, THIS TIME, IT’S THE OPPOSITE!

Here’s what he said:

I say this every year. “X” in Xmas is not the English letter X, it is “chi,” the first letter in the Greek word “Christos” which means “Christ.” Since X is an abbreviation for the word “Christ” (and has been for two millennia), “Xmas” means “Christmas.” It is not a 21st century attempt to remove Christ from Christmas. Now please, can we all just let it go.

Check it outXMAS